There was a very popular book in the 1970’s called, I’m Okay, You’re Okay. And the basic premise of the book was that we’re all really ALRIGHTY! That we’re not that bad and so we don’t really need forgiveness to be better. But the Christian message is more like “I’m not okay and you’re not okay, And that’s okay,” because God is willing to forgive us and make it OK when we turn to Him.....OK?
Ephesians 2:4 "But God, who is rich in mercy, in His great love wherewith He loved us, v5 Even when we were dead in sins, He has quickened us together with Christ, (for by grace you are saved;) v6 And has raised us up together, and made us to sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus: v7 That in the ages to come, He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. v8 For by grace you are saved through faith, and that is not of yourselves, for it is the gift of God"...
I went to workout at the community gym about 6:00 pm, and when I was finished,, I went to the front gate of the pool and just leaned against the gate for a moment to get a breather, before I started my walk home. There was a group of folks sitting at a table and a guy got up and was looking at me a bit quriously, then started walking toward me with the same qurious look... I wondered what was going on, and he walked right up to me and said, "Do you have the pizza?"... I said "No, I just came from the work out room.".... He yelled over to the rest of his party at the table and said "He just came from the work out room"..... The guy at the table sounded disappointed and echoed "He just came from the work out room".... Have you ever had your expectations dashed, when you were really looking forward to something.... It made me want to just go get the people some pizza!!!!! Well I believe that's what happens when folks are looking for us to be the Christian they expected and we didn't bring the pizza!
We are not perfect, just forgiven....so Let me make it clear, that no perfect people are allowed at Eagle's Rest, because you would really just mess it up! We only allow imperfect people here (is anyone qualified)... We're all just works in progress, we're under construction and when you point your finger at someone, you've got four pointing back at you....so make sure you're pointing out something good and not some flaw or fault they have. Oh yes, before I forget, I wanted everyone to know, If you've ever wanted to live in a castle, this is your chance. The state of Saxony in eastern Germany has a dozen castles for sale, and listen to this...each one is priced at one German mark (which is just over half of a US dollar). There is a catch, however. According to a New York Times article, the historic structures are in advanced stages of disrepair, and buyers must restore each property "consistent with its historical architecture." Estimates for restoration run from $7 million to $60 million per castle.
It has occurred to me that buying a fixer-upper's nightmare gives us a picture of what God has done for each of us in Jesus. But the hopelessness and brokeness of the human condition has never yet discouraged or stopped God's restoring love. The renovation and renewal the Father carries out in all who receive His Son begins with new life. And what God purchased at the great cost of His only Son, He gives to us freely, and one of the greatest gifts we have received is forgiveness, forgiveness at a depth and intensity that is mind boggling.
Forgiveness begins a new chapter in the life of every believer. It's like a resurrection, in that we are given a new beginning, with the promise of a new life...
Colossians 3:1 "If you are then risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sits on the right hand of God".
Unforgiveness is like a grave of the past that tries to hold you and prevent you from experiencing the resurected life of Jesus so you can be free from the past and you can fulfil your true potential. It's like trying to build a house with a glass hammer, it won't happen....
Unforgiveness wants to trap you in a tomb of resentment, anger, pain, or suffering of some kind. It's like trying to ride a bicycle with the brakes on all the time. It slows you down, frustrates you and makes it difficult *.....to move forward. Unforgiveness is a form of self-destruction, hitting yourself and expecting the other person to hurt... it's like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. If you can't forgive others for their sake, then forgive them for your own sake.
A married couple had many sharp disagreements over the course of their marriage. Yet somehow the wife always stayed calm and collected. On their twenty-fifth anniversary the husband commented on his wife’s restraint
“When I get mad at you,” he said, “you never fight back. How do you control your anger?” The wife replied, “I work it off cleaning the toilet.” The husband said, “That makes absolutly no sense, how does that help?” She said, “I use your toothbrush.” (He's been brushing 25 years with those tooth brushes)
We like Jesus the person, we like His stories, we want His healing power, His miracles, We like the practical “how to’s” as it relates to prayer and sharing and giving. We love the promise that there is life beyond the door of death.
But WOAH...this forgiving your enemies and those who have wronged you, and hurt you, is another matter for most of us...and we just don't like it... But forgiveness allows you take back the power and to break free from limiting beliefs and emotions. It frees up your potential, so you can apply it to creating a better life.
Hebrews 12:15 "Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God, (or fail in giving grace to others) lest any root of bitterness springing up defile you, and thereby many be infected."
If we would spend more time showing our love, we would need to spend less time explaining our love…..
If you don’t intend to forgive others, then you should never pray “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors,” because you’re praying “Father, treat me like I’m treating them. Forgive me in the same manner I forgive others. Father, if I don’t forgive, don’t forgive me.” When you come to the Lord and ask Him to save, cleanse, and forgive you, He does; you’re forgiven and placed into the family of God. But you’re not done with forgiveness then. Not at all. Being forgiven is only the beginning, because then we must forgive others as we have been forgiven. Forgiving and being forgiven go together. The person who refuses to forgive destroys the bridge over which he must travel. The only person who can afford not to forgive is one who will never need forgiveness and that's no one!
Often people SAY they have “buried the hatchet.” But, they almost always keep a “map” that carefully marks the spot where it’s buried so they can dig it up when they need it.
A motorcycle patrolman suffered an accident that put him in the hospital. His injuries were to his legs and ankles, But when he woke up from surgery, he not only had a cast on his leg, but he also had a huge bandage taped securely across his bare hairy chest. The kind that will be exceedingly painful to tear off. As he looked at the bandage, he saw a message written on it. It said, "This is a gift from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week.” (sounds like she is not quite ready to do any forgiving)
Someone has said that we don’t hold onto a grudge as much as the grudge holds onto us.
Leonardo da Vinci painted his famous fresco of “The Last Supper” in a church in Milan. At the time that he painted this work he had an enemy who was a fellow painter. Da Vinci had a bitter falling out with this man and despised him, so when he got to the point of painting the face of Judas Iscariot at the table with Jesus, he decided to use the face of his enemy. It brought him great pleasure to think that for ages to come others would relate his enemy with Judas….the betrayer of Christ.
Well as weeks passed and he worked on the faces of the other disciples, which were faces of other friends, but when he got to the face of Jesus, he couldn’t make any progress….he had a “painter’s block.” He felt frustrated and confused. But in time he realized what was wrong. His hatred for the other painter was holding him back from finishing the face of Jesus. When he settled things with his enemy, and repainted the face of Judas, then he was able to paint the face of Jesus. Jesus is able to take his rightful place when His people walk in forgiveness...
The greatest proof that we are forgiven is that we forgive others. Ephesians 4:32 "And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you".
Jesus taught us in Matthew 6:12 "And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors".
As a matter of fact, Matthew 6:14 tells us, "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you v15 But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses".
A man was getting counseling from a Christian psychologist and said, “My neighbor slapped me yesterday, should I forgive him?” “Yes you should,” answered the counselor. “How many times should I forgive him?” the man asked. “How many times did he slap you?” “Once,” said the man. “Then forgive him once,” said the counselor. “But what if he slaps me fifty times?” the man asked. “Then you should forgive him forty-nine times,” came the answer. “Wait a minute, why only forty-nine times, if I was slapped fifty times?” the man asked. The counselor replied, “You deserve the fiftieth slap for allowing yourself to be slapped the first forty-nine times.”
Please hear me.....forgiveness is not becoming somebody's punching bag....Because you forgive, doesn't mean you start leading with your chin...(here hit me again)! There comes a time when you need to get away from people who continue to hurt you.... There comes a point when you have to say, "Deal me out. thank you kindly, pass me by..." "I'm taking that punching bag label off of my forehead".....
God would never expect a person to stay in an abusive situation, or remain in a place where a bully can continually victimize you..... For heaven's sake, get out of the way!!! What ever agreement you have that keeps you there needs to be renegotiated or cancelled.... That kind of situation is no longer about simple forgiveness but about self-destruction! That cycle needs to stop!
Remember forgiveness is not about changing the other person, it's about releasing yourself from the pressure and the weight of the hurt, the offence, and the injustice done to you. Jesus said, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do". That is precisely what we must say if we are going to follow Jesus. It means you will no longer keep a record of wrongs done to you. But it also means that you will not continue to subject yourself to those wrongs. No one should live with those things. You do it so you can move on with your life and not keep treading water in a pool of misery!
Once you stop chasing the wrong things, the right things will find you... Stop trying to please everyone....stop fearing the change that is necessary....stop putting yourself down....stop overthinking every situation and creating stuff that doesn't exist....stop trying to step into the future while holding on to the past....
Let me list a few things forgiveness does not mean....It does not mean condoning what someone did.....It does not mean pretending that it never took place.....It does not mean making excuses for other people’s bad behavior.... It does not mean justifying evil so that sin somehow becomes less sinful. It does not mean overlooking abuse.... It does not mean denying that others tried to hurt you repeatedly. It does not mean letting others walk all over you... It does not mean refusing to press charges when a crime has been committed....It does not mean forgetting the wrong that was done., or it will be repeated....It does not mean pretending that you were never hurt....It does not mean that you must restore the relationship to what it was before....It does not mean that you must become best friends again....It does not mean there must be a total reconciliation as if nothing ever happened....It does not mean that all negative consequences of sin are canceled....
There were missiles on the beaches of Key West, at the height of the Cuban Missile Crisis, as tension was building toward what could have been the outbreak of WW III, Soviet Premier Nikita Krushchev sent an urgent communique to President John F. Kennedy. In part, the message said, “You and I should not continue to pull on the ends of the rope in which we have tied the knot of war, because the harder you and I pull….the tighter the knot will become. And a time may come when this knot is tied so tight that the person who tied it is no longer capable of untying it. What that would mean I need not explain to you, because you yourself understand perfectly what dreadful forces our two countries possess.”
Kruschchev was realizing he had reached the point of no return, and when we make the decision to return evil for evil, we ARE choosing to yank on “the rope of conflict” and make the KNOT in our relationship so tight that we may never be able to untie it.
With all that said, It has helped me tremendously to see those who victimized me as hurt people who were victims themselves, and that's why they hurt others. I can actually feel sorry for those people because they were the victims of someone in their own lives.
It also helps me to understand that Jesus loves them as much as He loves me, and He paid the ultimate price for them as He did for myself. So the fact that God loves them, requires that I love them.... Forgiveness is not an option or just a suggestion, it is a mandate we have received of the Lord.... Harry Emmerson Fosdick said that when he was a boy he overheard a conversation between his dad and his mother at the breakfast table. He heard his dad say, “Tell Harry he can mow the grass today if he feels like it.” Then as his father was leaving, he heard him say, “Tell Harry that he’d better feel like it.” We forgive in order for the miracle to happen....Jesus said forgive as you have been forgiven....because another name for Christian is "Forgiven".....It is a mandate which we have received of the Lord. If we are going to follow Jesus, we must forgive. We have no other choice. And we must forgive as God has forgiven us—freely, completely, graciously, totally. The miracle we have received is a miracle we pass on to others.
Mark Twain said it this way: “Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet gives to the heel that has crushed it.” Jesus was crushed so we could be forgiven....
The words of an old gospel song by Elisha Hoffman, ring in my ears today:
"Have you been to Jesus for the cleansing flood? Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb? Are you fully trusting in his grace this hour? Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb? Lay aside the garments that are stained with sin, And be washed in the blood of the Lamb! There’s a fountain flowing for the soul unclean, O be washed in the blood of the Lamb". Luke 12:48 "To whom much is given, much shall be required" and when we think of all we have been forgiven, it gets easier and easier to forgive.
There may be some of us who have been deeply hurt by the things others have done to us. Jesus walked that valley....People have attacked us, maligned us, mistreated us, abused us, assaulted us, ridiculed us, belittled us, publicly humiliated us, physically beaten us, and they may have done it deliberately, repeatedly, viciously. In response the enemy wants us to become hard on the inside to protect ourselves from any further pain. But that hardness can make it difficult for us to hear the gentle call of the Holy Spirit. We need soft hearts to hear his voice.
And then we need courage. The timid will never forgive. Only the brave will forgive. Only the strong will have the courage to let go of the past. May God soften our hearts to hear the truth. And may God give us courage do the hard thing and let go of our bitterness, give up our anger, turn away from our resentment, stop keeping score, and enter into the miracle of total forgiveness.
Because another name for Christian is 'Forgiven"
Prayer....Father, go now where my words cannot go—deep into our hearts and into places that only Your Spirit can go. Grant that we may discover the freedom that comes from being great forgivers. Break the chain of remembered hurts that binds us to the past. Lord, give us the courage to look at you hanging on the cross for us, and see the price you paid for our forgiveness. Show us what we must do and then give us the courage to do it.
We pray in Jesus’ name, Amen.
